Author: Widow Badass

I Passed The Test; Also, I Can Be Bribed

On By Widow BadassIn Goals & Dreams, Health Transformation, Retirement50 Comments
Captured from the countdown app on my phone this morning.

My last day of work fast approacheth…and I have been busy both at work and outside of it, getting ready for this change. My successor has been chosen by my work and it’s the person I’ve been mentoring and grooming for this role for a few years now (Yay!). She officially takes over my position on December 16th, and I overlap with her for 2 weeks to make sure she settles in nicely (of which I have no doubt!). So that’s finalized and I feel great about it, and am already busy showing her what life as a lab manager is all about.

Also on the work front, I have been approached to consider working part-time – next door to my old lab – to assist for a few months in a project evaluating and validating a new technology. Like the proverbial old-timey fire horse that leaps from the stall when the fire bell rings, my mind immediately jumped to the positive possibilities (close to my successor should she have any questions; start-ups are fun; building labs are fun, etc.) and for 5 hot minutes I could see me doing this thing. Then I calmed down and realized that this will negatively impact the plans and goals for 2020 that I am looking so forward to diving into. Ye olde fire horse trotted calmly and thankfully back into the barn as I decided not to consider this offer any further.

Thus I passed this test! The test that says for me: do you really want to be retired? Answer: Hell, yes! Still yes!

On other retirement planning news, I settled on an extended health and benefit insurance plan to carry on into 2020 with me. An explanation for American friends that may not know our system: Canadians get free healthcare but still have to pay for drugs, dental care, and certain therapies (e.g. physiotherapy) out of pocket. Unless one’s employer offers a benefits package that takes care of this, as a job perk. Well, I have such a package that even includes travel insurance, accidental death etc., but obviously that is terminating along with my employment. So now, if I want to continue with these benefits, I have to seek out and pay for a plan on my own.

After several months of researching private plans and determining if it even makes sense for me to have such a plan (and in my opinion it does), I decided to purchase the plan offered by my company’s current provider of extended health and dental benefits. Manulife’s FollowMe plan ticked the most boxes for me.

But wait, it got better! When I called Manulife to set up my new plan effective January 1, I was informed of an additional health and wellness program called Vitality and did I wish to join? It would cost $5/month but save me 5% on my monthly premium and I would get an activity tracker – Garmin or Apple Watch. Since I am of a mind to get and stay healthy especially in retirement (and can do math, and am a lover of all things Apple) the only acceptable response from me was “shut up and take my money!”

Yes, yes, I know. “Big Brother” Manulife is wanting my data. And I am OK with that. Because Big Brother needs to know if anything happens to my health, or else Big Brother will have a reason to cancel my policy. Besides, people with nothing to hide hide nothing. Plus anybody living in today’s society who thinks they have any kind of privacy anymore is kidding themselves, anyway.

Then I had to wait to get my welcome package (snail mail…ugh) and sign on to the website once I got my new ID number (enclosed within paper package).

So, here is the deal with the activity tracker(s): I could (and did) get the Garmin Vivofit tracker sent to me for free. I could also decide to get either an Apple Watch Series 3 or 5, and pay a portion plus the tax towards the watch. Here’s the bribe part: if you earn points per month on the Vitality website by living a healthy life, your monthly payment towards the remainder of the watch cost is either discounted or brought entirely down to zero dollars, depending on your total points. Points are earned for daily physical activities (and a half-price membership to GoodLife Fitness is another perk offered by Vitality) and other healthy habits such as getting a flu shot, mammogram, colon cancer check, and going for a dental checkup. STUFF I DO ALREADY WITHOUT NEEDING TO BE BRIBED.

What do you think I did, gentle reader? Hint below:

Photo taken while waiting at Shoppers Drug Mart for my flu shot…I plan to pay not a penny more towards this beauty by doing all the healthy things I should be doing regardless.

I think this plan is just fantastic. After all, everyone (including Manulife, obvs!) knows an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure, especially when it comes to health.

What I can’t understand is why I only learned of it after I contacted Manulife to purchase my post-work life benefits package. Why was it not mentioned in any of the FollowMe health plan information I was sent by email initially? It would have made my decision to go with FollowMe even easier. Perhaps it is very new?

So now I am even more pleased with my selection of this provider. And I am loving my new Apple watch and busy learning all that it can do. Including unlocking my laptop for me! And guessing that I am working out and what type of workout it is. Crazy, I know…I love living in today’s world (most of the time)!

Rock on,

The WB

Wednesday Night’s Alright for Fighting

On By Widow BadassIn Good Times, Music60 Comments

Anyone who knew me as a young teenager knew that one of the artists whose music I was obsessed with was Elton John (not yet a Sir). (Aerosmith and Queen were among the others, in case anyone was interested.)

1975. 16 year-old me at Camp Wabanaki sporting my Elton John t-shirt. Wish I still had it but I wore it to death, like most of my clothes from that time period. Also still wish I was at that weight. I remember wishing I could lose about 10 pounds, back then. HAH. Young, dumb and broke, indeed!

I first saw Elton John live in Orchard Park (just outside of Buffalo) in 1976 (or maybe it was 1975? Doesn’t matter. I think EJ likely didn’t know what year it was either 😉 ). I took a bus down to the US, with a high school friend. Elton was headlining, and Boz Scaggs and J.J. Cale opened for him. I don’t remember much more from that show except I got rained on, and Elton John DID NOT play Crocodile Rock, much to my absolute fury crushing disappointment dismay. Even though the whole stadium was screaming for it. Instead he told us he was gonna play “Your Song” – apparently a real fucking treat for us poor slobs as he hadn’t played it live in a long time. I was not impressed. I LOVED Crocodile Rock and had no idea at the time that he did not actually like this song, thinking of it as “disposable pop”. Really, Queen Elton? I still shudder at some of the crap you put out when you were a drug-addled mess, in years to come. Makes Crocodile Rock sound kinda alright now, don’t it? But you know me – I do don’t hold a grudge.

Anywho! Ahem. Back to the NOW, sorta.

Two years ago I heard Sir Elton was doing a farewell tour. So I joined his RocketClub fan club in order to have a better chance at decent tickets. Well, my name wasn’t drawn for the those shows so I thought it wasn’t to be. BUT then he announced he was coming back to Toronto the following year and whaddayaknow this time I got an email saying I was being offered the chance to purchase tickets more than a year in advance. Yup – October 9, 2018 I purchased 4 tickets (maximum allowed) to the October 23rd, 2019 show. My sister was staying with me at the time and immediately she snatched up one of the extra tickets (and my good friends Kenn and Jonathan seized the other two). In order to get these decent seats, I had to buy something called a VIP package, which came with a bunch of stuff that I promptly forgot about until I came home from Vancouver Island to find a big box of goodies delivered in my absence.

Inside the box was this “lithograph” accompanied by a certificate of authenticity – what anyone else would call a poster, I guess. But we have to be ultra because ELTON JOHN. You can see I framed it and hung it on the wall already. Because OBVIOUSLY. DUH!
More of what was in the box – 1 of each for each ticketholder, along with the poster lithograph. Tote bag, journal, pen and pencil set, passport holder and luggage tag, key chain, and VIP lanyard and “pass” which got you exactly NOTHING at the show. Except maybe, I dunno: bragging rights?!?

Finally the long-awaited day arrived and we made it to Toronto, to the ScotiaBank Arena, for THE SHOW!

How excited are me and Sister Badass for the show to begin? PLENTY. PLENTY EXCITED.
Jonathan, Kenn, and I. Also plenty excited for the show to start! I really must get better at this selfie thing. Sheesh.
The Stage. Pretty damn ornate, if you ask me. You can barely see it in the next photo – how the edges of the stage are “carved” with symbols representing Sir Elton’s interests and career, e.g. the GUCCI logo was one of them.
One of the cool graphics playing on the huge screen. The many faces of Sir Elton John.
The man himself. First outfit of the night.
EJ wheeled out this demure number after he got changed during the spooky intro to Funeral for a Friend. I love his brooch. Must be a favourite piece as I have seen pictures of it numerous times, pinned to His Person.
Good ol’ Captain Fantastic! I think this cartoon ran during Someone Saved My Life Tonight. (from the Captain Fantastic and the Brown Dirt Cowboy album)
Psychedelic graphics – forget to which song. Too busy rockin’ out. Sorry. Not sorry.

The show was incredible, and Elton’s voice was still strong. I had low expectations because I knew he had had throat surgery and couldn’t reach the high notes anymore. I was blown away by how good his voice still was. He really belted out those lyrics.

And…HE PLAYED CROCODILE ROCK! I also had no very low expectations of that happening and just about passed out with joy when the song started. No matter that he could no longer sing the falsetto “lah lalalalalahs” – WE sang them for him. “For the fans” flashed across the screen during the number – his not-so-subtle way of letting everyone know he still hates this song, I guess.

It only took 43 years, but I finally got my wish and heard Elton John play Crocodile Rock live. So,

Sir Elton Hercules John, if you’re reading:

All is forgiven.

Love,

The Widow Badass

As if all the wonderful music wasn’t enough (none of the his “coked-out MOR crap” dreck made it to the set list, thankfully), it was also heart-warming to hear him speak of his life and his struggles, and to see his emotional response to us – wiping away tears caused by the love the crowd was showing him.

I probably won’t ever see Sir Elton John in concert again, if he makes good on his promise of no more world tours. But I saw him on Wednesday October 23rd, and once before when I was very young (probably not a Wednesday though), and that will have to do.

Rock on,

The WB

P.S.

Elton’s Memoir – I was going to wait and get it from the library. Then I read all the great reviews on GoodReads so decided I couldn’t wait. And then I was going to get a digital copy. Because of: Moving to BC. Until I realized the photos would be much easier to see in hardcover. I should have this book done by the time this post is published. Yet one more thing to pack. So worth it. It’s all good. Hehehe!

P.P.S. links to reviews of the show Here and Here

Vancouver Island October 2019

On By Widow BadassIn Good Times, Move to Vancouver Island, Roadtripping, See the Beauty42 Comments

After a spring and summer filled with shenanigans (hehehe!), I had 4 vacation days left to use before my end of year retirement and it only seemed right to use them for a quick trip back to Vancouver Island to see my daughter and her boyfriend, in their new abode in Ladysmith.

I’ve been back home for over a week already, and only getting around to this post now – apologies, especially to Donna and Erica (two lovely bloggers I went hiking with during my recent visit) who were able to post already on the fun time we shared here and here.

Sleep deprivation, staff vacations, Elton John (more about this later!), and my sister coming for a visit all contributed to lack of blogging, and after catching up on rest this past weekend I feel mostly human again, and capable of stringing a few words together.

However, I think I’ll let my photos (and captions) do most of the talking. Behold:

Spotted this rascal on a walk along the Nanaimo waterfront on my first day back on the Island. I still can’t believe how close he/she let us get. Herons in Ontario are less bold.
Sunday found us doing some exploring via island hopping, since our planned whale-watching excursion got cancelled last minute due to “rough seas”. Uh huh. This photo was taken on Hornby Island – looking out towards Denman Island (with Vancouver Island in the distance). Note rough seas.
Waiting for the ferry to Denman Island. I still can’t believe we dared to take all those ferries in these rough seas.
View from the ferry, approaching Vancouver Island. Wait, are those actual waves?
Went to do some forest-bathing with these two rascals. The wonderful Donna and Erica. It’s always a great day for a hike when you have such lovely ladies for company. We talked about all the important things like we’d known each other for years. Even blogging!
Donna in her cute yellow rain jacket – being used here for scale!
Beautiful Holland Creek Trail
On my last full day, we went to Victoria to do some exploring in the capitol of BC. Chinatown was fun (and delicious!), as always.
This fine fellow greeted us as we entered Chinatown.
Of course we had to shoot a selfie in Fan Tan Alley.
After Chinatown, we walked through the city with the goal of getting to Fishermans’s Wharf. This is a statue of the artist, Emily Carr. That is a monkey on her back, that she is turning her attention to. I assume it was a pet – like her little dog, and not a statement about any struggles she may have been going through! The Empress Hotel is in the background. I enjoyed the high tea experience there, back in 2003. Fancy!
Mizz J (and K) looking towards Fisherman’s Wharf – our objective – which was eventually reached – although everything was closed when we got there.
We still had fun walking around and admiring the unique homes on Fisherman’s Wharf.
Fisherman’s Wharf warning sign. Point (get it? 😉 ) taken.

The week just flew by and was over far too soon. The beauty and charm of Vancouver Island continues to astound me. I wonder if I will ever get used to it. I hope not!

Rock on,

The WB

The Devil’s Lettuce, A Psychedelic Train Tunnel, and Slap-Happy Sexcapades: Another Blaze n’ Badass Weekend

On By Widow BadassIn Badassery, Good Times, Roadtripping, See the Beauty52 Comments
On the weekend agenda!

How’s that for an click-baity enticing title, eh? Last weekend was planned several months ago, after coordination with another blogging buddy and IRL friend, Karen Hume. Joanne (aka trail name: Blaze) and I visited Karen last in the summer of 2018 and another visit was definitely overdue!

Joanne asked me if there was anything in particular I wanted to see on our little road trip (besides Karen, of course) and without much hesitation I said “Tweed, in Smiths Falls!” This was more than cool with our intrepid Joanne as well, so off we went on Friday morning to see what this facility that grows cannabis was all about. Joanne wrote about her observations on our tour here and she has some great pictures of pot production at “Ganga University” as I call it, because our tour guide kept referring to the facility as a “campus”.

So, without replicating Joanne’s photos…we were both snapping away so a lot are the same…here are some of mine, from our tour:

There was a bit of a museum at the beginning of the tour, along with a video presentation on the history of cannabis. Worth watching!
These overhead lights are depicting the chemical structure of THC – the stuff in weed that gets you high.
These vials were filled with cotton balls doused in the different terpenes found in weed (also found in other organic items such as lemons and pine) – the chemicals that contribute to the taste and scent of cannabis. So we sniffed away, and cleansed our nasal palates in between with coffee beans. Apparently there are people who smoke weed for the flavour so descriptions of cannabis products talk about this. Sorry highly informative and cute little tour guide: I have yet to talk to someone whose first concern is the flavour of the weed they are smoking despite you assuring me of the existence of such unicorns connoisseurs.
Here is the source of one of Joanne’s disappointments : a chocolate room not making chocolate, even though it was supposed to be Day One of production. So clean! So shiny! So devoid of activity and chocolate! Sorry, Joanne! 🙁
Smiling despite the lack of chocolate and free (or otherwise) cannabis to try.

After a couple of hours spent gaining an education about ye olde electric lettuce, bhang, mary jane, dank, green goddess etc., we were off to meet up with Karen for some pub grub and plans for our Saturday together. Which included visiting:

The Brockville Farmer’s Market! Bursting with fall produce.

And the Brockville Railway Tunnel, Canada’s first:

Joanne and Karen admiring the mineral deposits forming in the tunnel interior.
Our tunnel experience included quite the light and music show! But you know what was missing though? Some Tweed product samples would have put the cherry on the icing on the cake of our railway tunnel visit, doncha think? 😉

While visiting with Karen, we stayed at a lovely little complex on the banks of the St. Lawrence River:

St. Lawrence sunrise, from the deck surrounding our rooms.
Signs of a beautiful fall all around us.

And it really was lovely, except for the paper thin walls between the rooms. On Saturday night Joanne and I turned in early, in our respective but far apart rooms – we’d had a full day of catching up and touring the area with Karen, and had filled up on some delicious Chinese food for supper as well. We were both looking forward to relaxing with a good book and catching up on our (a-hem) beauty sleep.

Joanne was treated to a loudly battling father and son in the room next to hers while I was treated to something else entirely.

There I was, safely tucked into bed and enjoying a good book, when I heard the unmistakeable sounds of…er…knockin’ boots, from the other side of the wall behind my headboard. Which was not at all unusual I suppose, except that I was also treated to some loud and (I sincerely hope) playful slapping going on, besides! Talk about your “slap and tickle” – it was a veritable slap and tickle festival happening next door to me. Hah! Thankfully it was at a decent hour in the evening and the festivities um climaxed died down before they cut into my ability to sleep.

The next morning we shared our experiences at breakfast while I scanned the couples in the complex’s dining room to try and figure out who was the slapper and who was the slappee of the previous evening. I think I figured it out. Not only that, we ran into those same people at a highway rest stop on the way back to our respective homes later that morning! The woman seemed in quite a jolly mood so I inferred from this that apparently all that slapping was done in a loving and consensual manner.

Joanne asked me how long I had to listen to this symphony of slap-happy sex. I said long enough that I didn’t have to feel sorry for the female partner. 😉

Have you ever had your rest interrupted by a loud couple next door? Do tell, and…

Rock on,

The WB

Fall(ish) on the Trail

On By Widow BadassIn Badassery, See the Beauty, The Great Outdoors68 Comments

Yes – I know, I know! The fall equinox is not officially until the 23rd (@ 03:50 Eastern Time – thanks Interwebs) but that’s on a Monday – and still a workday for yours truly. So I’m posting this on the first day of Old-school FallTM, you know – September 21st? Like June 21 is the start of Old-school SummerTM, March 21 is Old-school SpringTM and December 21 is Old-school WinterTM?

Imagine my chagrin at seeing this sign at the start of my favourite, local walking trail:

WTF? Not THIS again. The trail was closed last fall too. Hmmmph! It’s almost as if the City is saying: Let’s see, what is the best time for people to enjoy this trail? Fall? Right, then – that’s when we’ll shut ‘er down. Again. For the second year running.

I shrugged my shoulders and sauntered past the sign, to see what was the issue. I walked on and on, thoroughly enjoying my lawlessness the scenery for many glorious minutes, until I came upon this sign:

Oh goody. They are going to replace the bridge. But work hasn’t begun yet. I appreciate the City looking out for my personal safety. They can consider their asses well and truly covered with this sign. I’ll be sure not to sue no matter what happens.

You guessed it, my fellow Badassians! I blew past this sign too. With not even a wobble on the bridge. That looked and behaved exactly as it had the week before and every day I’ve been on it for the past – oh – 15 years. And was I ever glad I took a chance.

(Sometimes my rebellious nature does come in handy – are you reading this in the Hereafter, Mom and Dad?)

Because I caught sight of this majestic blue heron,
and this lovely Monarch,
and these gorgeous leaves changing colour already,
and these beautiful asters,
and these wild grapes and viburnum berries, nicely intermingled…
and these lovely viburnum berries with the glorious blue sky peeking through.

I suppose one day soon I will come upon the bridge (or more likely where the bridge USED to be) and be thwarted from walking further until it is repaired and replaced. But until then, it will take more than a couple of signs to keep me off this trail in the Fall!

And that’s a Badass promise!

What rules have you been breaking lately? Do tell!

Rock on,

The WB

A Week of Firsts and Lasts

On By Widow BadassIn Badassery, Good Times, Retirement, See the Beauty57 Comments

Last week I travelled to Dallas, Texas for my last-ever North American Lab Managers meeting. Over the past 14 years I have been able to travel to places like California, Wisconsin, Pennsylvania, Quebec, Minnesota, New York and Maine to meet up with my fellow lab managers to discuss various topics related to our jobs testing milk for the purpose of dairy herd improvement.

The usual suspects appear at these meetings year-after-year and you get to know and respect them soon enough and look forward to catching up with them at this annual conference. So this last meeting was bittersweet, for me.

I was pleased to hear from so many of my colleagues that I will be missed. A couple of my partners-in-crime at this meeting have promised to drop in on me at my new home on Vancouver Island. I may wake up one day to find an RV full of these rascals parked in my driveway. Which would be way cool, as they are a fun bunch, and we had a lotta laughs after the first day’s very full agenda of speakers and discussions, when we headed to the hotel bar to kick back and shoot the you-know-what. 😉

The second day of this 2-day conference is always a tour day. I didn’t know where we were going until the day before, so had low to no expectations as to what we were going to be treated to. The agenda said we would first tour a Federal Milk Marketing Order lab (always cool to see someone else’s facility), then after lunch we would visit the George W. Bush Presidential Library and Museum, and then the Fort Worth Stockyards before having dinner in Fort Worth. (George W. Bush was not exactly my favourite American president and I had no idea what we would see at the stockyards so my expectations remained low.)

Imposing entrance. It’s presidential, after all!

I was very pleasantly surprised and impressed at the quality of exhibits at this museum, and I would encourage anyone visiting the Dallas area to take the time to visit. (I didn’t have time to check out the library portion so can’t comment on that.)

There was of course a large part of the museum dedicated to 9/11 artifacts, as this occurred during Dubya’s presidency. It was very moving to see this, especially as we visited on September 10 – one day before the 18th anniversary of this horrific day.

Twisted, heat-damaged steel beams from the World Trade Center in front of a wall with the names of every victim and some of the stories from that awful time.

There were many exhibits (including short videos) on the Bush presidency – all aspects of their lives and the initiatives undertaken by the Bushes – as well as a recreation of the Oval Office, as it existed during that time.

Clothes worn by the Bushes along with place settings used at state dinners.
First Dog, Spot

Like I said earlier, I was not a fan of Dubya. Although after seeing the projects he and Mrs. Bush championed during his terms, and contrasting and comparing that to who is in charge now, I’ve decided he wasn’t really all that bad. In fact, he seems like a bit of a moral and mental giant to me now, considering…a-hem! 😉

An American I was with at the time said much the same to me as we walked through the halls of the museum. Said he’d like to shake Bush’s hand NOW as he didn’t realize at the time how much worse things could get. See, all you need to be remembered kindly is to have someone come later who’s a complete villain/moron.

Gosh, part of me very selfishly hopes the next lab manager makes people remember me fondly too! 😉

After seeing these artifacts, and an exhibit across the hall on presidential retreats (also hella interesting – so interesting I forgot to take pics, sorry!), it was “Back on the bus, people!” to get to the Fort Worth stockyards just in time for a CATTLE DRIVE!

Twice a day Texas longhorn cattle are driven down the street in a recreation of the time when these animals were herded from the natural pastures of Fort Worth along the Chisholm Trail to railheads in Kansas. “C’mon cows!”, the cowboys sang out as they passed. (Although even a city slicker like me could tell they were mostly steers, not cows.)

I flew home on September 11. Didn’t notice any heightened security or anything like that, and at the airports it was just another day. As it should be.

Then on September 12 – the day I had been eagerly anticipating for weeks – I went to Thrive Studios to meet with Angela McDonald to get a major piece inked onto my forearm. My first large black and grey tattoo!

My “Mucha Mermaid”, freshly inked. Took a little over 2 hours. I am beyond pleased with Angela’s artistry in realizing my vision for this piece.
48 hours later. Still healing. Sorry about the poor light. I have it heavily moisturized and there was a glare on my arm if I was in better light.

This piece has multiple meanings for me. One is that is symbolizes my future, surrounded by the ocean on Vancouver Island.

The other, larger meaning is that it is in honour of my mother (mostly) and representative of my family. My mother (the mermaid) loved the water, loved to swim, was a lifeguard, taught water aerobics and supervised a therapy pool at a retirement home before she retired. My dad (the damaged anchor) was also in love with the sea and worked for a bit for the Dutch Merchant Marine as a young man. He would have kept with it, but the papers came through for immigration to Canada soon after joining, so that ended that dream for him. The cracks in the anchor speak to the demons that plagued him (and that the family bore the brunt of), especially as he got older. The three little fish are me and my two sisters. When I mentioned to my daughter the tattoo she reminded me that this was initially her idea for a tattoo many years ago, minus the cracks in the anchor and the little sister fishies. I had forgotten about this and obviously had stolen (unknowingly) her idea. Sorry, kiddo!

Speaking of stealing others’ good ideas – just before I left for Dallas, I received an order from Vistaprint of “business” cards, for handing out to friends and such once I am retired. (Really, what do you call these damn things when you aren’t working anymore??? They need a better name than business cards!)

I know of several retired people who have gotten cards done for this purpose, and I was especially inspired by Janis of Retirementally Challenged, who designed a beautiful card with a quote on it! So once again I stole (knowingly, this time). Behold:

What you can’t see is that I ordered a pearlescent sheen on these cards. Oh, I be so FANCY. This quote sums up just about everything I’d love to be/have/do in my retirement. Well, plus family, and assorted adventures with plenty of “shenanigans” involved. Yeah, I want it all.

I’m back to “normal life” for the next couple of weeks until Joanne and I hit the road for a weekend adventure. Sixteen weeks left at my work. Time is flying now.

And how are you all making out as we head into Autumn? Do tell!

Rock on,

The WB

A Decade of Blogging: Some Thoughts

On By Widow BadassIn Blogging87 Comments
Happy birthday, dear Bloggie!

Today marks the 10th anniversary of me starting what has morphed into ye old blogge. Ten years ago today I sat down in front of my computer at my shabby little former abode and went onto a platform called Blogger to create The Next Year of My Life – a blog to capture all the thoughts and events leading up to me getting married again, 365 days hence. Thus today also marks the 9th anniversary of my wedding to the late JD.

Never could I ever have imagined all that has happened to me in the 10 years since September 3, 2009. Here’s a listing of the highlights and links to my posts about them. And here’s an additional link to include my big news of 2019.

During the course of my 10 year journey to get here, I was often silent for large chunks of time (sorry, dear Bloggie!) due to what was happening to me in real life. But I never abandoned my blog completely and I hope I never get into another situation where I feel I can’t blog because I can’t write about what is actually going on or really bothering me. Or because I became the unwilling Mayor of Crazytown and no longer had a moment to myself. I am confident it will never happen to me again (cough*no more men*cough). 😉

When I first started blogging, I had no readers. I did not know how to get readers. I didn’t know if I even wanted readers. I just needed the outlet to get my thoughts and pictures out there, to keep a “journal” of sorts – that I could access from anywhere, anytime. And blogging fit the bill for me.

And the blog grew and changed as I grew and changed. I went from Blogger to WordPress.com, changed the name a few times (and imported the old posts into the new blog – easy peasey) until finally settling on The Widow Badass Blog and purchasing my own domain (www.widowbadass.com) and all that goes with that. I knew I was on to something when the young man at Bluehost exclaimed “What a cool name!” as I explained over the phone the domain I wanted. Funnily (and luckily) enough, it was available!

I’ve had a lot of thoughts about ye olde blogge over the past 10 years. At various points in time I admired very successful bloggers who make a living from their blogs, and have important and uplifting messages that they share on their platforms. For a hot second, I imagined joining their ranks. But then I remembered who I am, and I know I would quickly burn out/get bored/move on. I don’t think I could ever settle on one “niche” or “brand” for my blog. I’m a dabbler, not a digger remember?

The Widow Badass Blog suits me just fine. (I can imagine being the WB for ever and ever, amen.) In it, I can talk about anything that happens to be on my mind at the moment. And need not worry if I am deviating from my message, ‘cos I don’t have a single topic or message. I am a proud member of a vanishing tribe, the one that got me into blogging in the first place: the Eclectic Bloggers.

After JD passed away and I reclaimed/rebuilt my life, the ability and desire to post more regularly came back and I also began reading more blogs. I rekindled long held passions, such as hiking. A Google search on hiking the Bruce Trail led me to Joanne’s (now dormant) blog about that very thing, and to her current blog. Which led to us commenting on each others’ blogs and eventually meeting in person. And now we have gone on several adventures together, even heading to Newfoundland for a week this spring, to hike and explore! I think it is accurate to say that most of the current readers/bloggers I like to visit are also readers of Joanne’s blog and have gotten to know me through her. Thanks pal! 🙂

Joanne is not the only blogger that has become a real life friend. Karen H. (currently inactive), Donna, and Karen G. (currently inactive) are also friends I have met in real life as well as on the blogosphere, all thanks to reading and commenting on each other’s blogs.

Which leads me to the most valuable thing (for me) that has come out of 10 years of blogging: finding like-minded (and often far-flung) souls. Finding your “tribe” and building/contributing to a community. I think it’s harder to find and make friends in today’s world. Everyone is so busy and any idle time is spent with a face buried in a cell phone, instead of interacting with the people around you. I’m guilty of this myself, as I am usually reading a book on my phone, if I am waiting for anybody or thing when out. (I’m trying to be better and more present in the world, but when the book draws you in and you can’t put it down, well…I am only human, after all!)

Despite technology interfering with people interacting face-to-face, I don’t know of a better medium than this self-same technology in which to leisurely get to know someone and have them get to know you by reading and commenting on a personal blog. Real friendships can come out of this. And if the stars align and the geographical difficulties can be overcome, you may be lucky enough to enjoy a bloggers’ meetup, and get to meet your new friends in real life. What could be better than that?

This is the single best thing about blogging, for me.

So here’s to you old Bloggie, ye olde friend (and friend-gatherer) of mine! Looking forward to whatever/whomever the next 10 years of blogging badassery will bring into my life. Cheers!!!

Rock on,

The WB

“If I’d Known I Was Gonna Live This Long…

On By Widow BadassIn Badassery, Health Transformation, Music, Retirement67 Comments

…I’d have taken better care of myself. “- Eubie Blake

This week I got some news that I’d been waiting for – my health traits analysis, from My Heritage. They were able to pull this information from the sample I had submitted last year, for my genetic makeup.

I was absolutely sure that I would be told I was at increased risk for cardiac disease, given my history with TIAs, and my family history (father dying at 63 from a massive heart attack, younger sister experiencing a heart attack, other relatives with coronary artery disease). However, I am only at average risk for this and other biggies that people don’t want to know about – like Alzheimers and Parkinsons. My Heritage warns you before they give you the data that this information is in there, and asks you to assent that you actually do want to see your genetic propensity for these devastating diseases. Of course, I clicked a resounding YES. Information is power, people. If I am at an elevated risk for Alzheimers, damn straight I want to know about it so I can plan accordingly!

Long story short – I am at average risk for heart disease, various cancers, Crohn’s disease, some stuff I never heard of, and the aforementioned Alzheimers and Parkinsons. Whew!

I am slightly increased risk for Celiac disease. Hmmm…perhaps this explains my heartburn when I eat wheat, currently under control thanks to modern medicine?

And last but certainly not least, my health report states I am at significantly decreased risk of developing age-related macular degeneration – this is a relief, especially for someone with plans to play a lot with paint in retirement!

So now that it looks like I might live a lot longer than I had anticipated, maybe it’s time to take better care of myself. I’ve noticed I’ve been in a gradual decline of energy this summer.

I’ve been severely anemic before, and this is starting to feel a lot like that. Brain fog, overall fatigue and lack of stamina, lack of focus, falling asleep whenever I am “quiet”. I couldn’t even whip up the energy to make it to Riverfest Elora last weekend so there went the $99 I spent last August on a weekend pass for this year’s festival…ah well, that water is so far under the bridge, it’s already made it to the ocean. 🙂

This is so not me.

I did save my energy so I could go see P!nk on Sunday night though – the ticket was a birthday gift from a good friend of mine!

P!nk performing Just Like Fire. Guess who forgot her good camera at home, and had to rely on ye olde iPhonne? See aforementioned brain fog…sigh.
So What? She’s still a rock star, and she flew all around the arena in that harness. While singing. And doing all sorts of acrobatic maneuvers. BADASS.

OK, where was I? Ah yes. Feeling anemic. I mentioned in a comment to Donna, of Retirement Reflections, that I was needing an iron supplement to keep up with the schedule of things I have lined up. She thought I was joking. I was not, Donna! Behold:

This wonder elixir made me feel 20 years younger when I was anemic, years ago. One week after taking this liquid, I felt restored, and back to my old go-get ’em self again. Something months of swallowing iron tablets failed to do.

I purchased a bottle this week and will be taking it faithfully. My iron levels are on the low side of normal at the best of times, but I feel they may have slipped even further as I haven’t been eating a lot of red meat for many months now (and I’ve started really craving beef – another sign from my body that iron is needed). If this doesn’t pep me up, I’ll be making a visit to the doc for a thorough checkup.

Also on the self-care theme: I splashed out today on a Philips Sonicare toothbrush. My faithful Oral B toothbrush is showing signs of imminent battery failure, as it needs to be charged every other day now…and I am on my last brush head before needing to buy more. So it was definitely time to fish or cut bait as I’ve been dithering about what to do next for the past few months of watching my Oral B steadily go downhill.

This was a pretty expensive purchase. What to do? Get another Oral B, go back to a regular toothbrush, check out the Sonicare…Ultimately I decided on the latter. These were the thoughts that were going through my head:

  1. I’ll be retired in a matter of months and won’t be able to afford it as easily then. (Already I am having these fearful thoughts about no more paycheques…shit!)
  2. What’s the most environmentally friendly option? (Probably rubbing at your teeth with a twig…sigh. Moving on…)
  3. I spent 6 grand on my smile these past 2 years (hello, Invisalign!); an electric toothbrush is protecting my investment.
  4. I’ll have to pay for dental benefits once I retire and my coverage might not be as good as when I was employed; I’d better take the best care possible of my teeth. (More fearful thoughts! Double shit!!)

So, this is what’s going on with me at the moment – trying to get back some energy, and trying to keep my mouth healthy. And realizing that I am worrying already, about finances post-work life. Even though I have done the math over and over again. And my head knows I WILL BE FINE.

What about you, recent retirees or old hands at it? Did you have fearful thoughts about finances when contemplating your retirement? Do tell…

Rock on,

The WB

Kitchener Blues Festival 2019

On By Widow BadassIn Good Times, Music44 Comments

This post was supposed to be created last night (Monday) but unfortunately the author crashed hard after work because she can’t party-hardy for an entire weekend anymore like she used to. C’est dommage! Yes, it was that great of a Blues Festival and I am going to sorely miss attending it when I move to Vancouver Island.

This entire festival (after the fund-raising opener on Thursday night) is FREE. And there is even an app you can download to see the schedule and stages, and highlight the performers you want to see (which then automatically inputs into your Google calendar, with alerts on your phone an hour before the performance. HOW COOL IS THAT?!?)

Volunteer-run and sponsor-supported, it is truly a great one and next year it will be its 20th year of existence! That is quite an accomplishment. I did what I could to pour money into this event to support it and the artists, coming home with a bunch of purchases and then buying music when I got home. If I wasn’t moving, I’d be volunteering next year when I’m retired.

Of course, I made sure to attend the Thursday evening fund-raising show – Misty Blues Band and Tom Cochrane & Red Rider. My pal Kath gifted me with a ticket because she felt bad I was cheated out of Roxodus. So sweet!

Misty Blues Band – what a voice this woman has! So warm and lovely in person too.
Tom Cochrane and band gave a great show. He is great at connecting with the audience with his stories of his long career playing across Canada. Life IS a highway, dude!

Friday afternoon selected performances started with watching the Grand River Blues Society Youth Camp performers put on a show. These kids really rocked!

I wonder how many will make a career of performing, eventually?

At the conclusion of their show, all the performers marched through the audience playing their instruments. I thought that was so cool. But apparently not everyone (cough*Jimmy*cough) shared that sentiment. More on that later…

Next up (for me) was catching Wild T and the Spirit’s set. The man could play a guitar!
After Wild T, came Erja Lyytinen from Finland. Another great artist.

After these 2 artists came a tribute to the 50th anniversary of Woodstock, with various performers including Wild T doing – of course – Jimi Hendrix. I was too busy singing and rockin’ out to take pictures by this point.

My friend Kath (and my host for the weekend) and I rockin’ our Friday night at Bluesfest, with our Bluesfest T-shirts on.

Saturday’s picks started out at noon for me – with Bill Durst – thanks to a recommendation from Kath and George’s friend, Jimmy. How had I never heard of this man before??? I became an instant fan of his music. Plus, you gotta love any man who can rock a beard/pony/braid thing.

I stan Bill Durst, as the kids say.
Susan (Mrs. Jimmy) and I with Bill. One of the great things about this festival is getting to meet the artists after their shows.
Bill’s wife (also named Susan) was selling these bracelets she made from used guitar string ball-ends. Blessed by the music, she said. Shut up and take my money, I said.
Later, I stayed at the Clock Tower Stage to watch The Northern Pikes put on a killer show including mashing together AC/DC and Aerosmith with their hit “She Ain’t Pretty”. What a really great band! Jimmy and Susan meandered off to watch some other artists.

I guess I should talk about Jimmy now. I don’t like saying negative things about people on ye olde blogge, especially if I like them. But since I told the same stuff to Jimmy’s face I will say them again here. And it’s kinda funny. At least, he made me smile. 🙂

Jimmy is a blues aficionado – he really knows his stuff (and disclaimer: I do like him!). Jimmy also has strong opinions on just about everything and is happy to share whether you want to hear them or not. When I told Jimmy (and everyone else) how wonderful I thought it was that the Blues Camp kids marched through the crowd playing their instruments, he scoffed at me and said “everyone does that”. I told him to quit raining on my parade.

Spoiler: He didn’t quit.

L-R: Jimmy, George and Susan at the Vanessa Collier show. George was my science teacher for grade nine and is Kathy’s husband. My career is all his fault. 😉 And this is Jimmy. Jimmy is a buzzkill.
Don’t be a Jimmy.
Big Dan and the Topsiders. I thought Big Dan was fantastic and had a great voice. Jimmy thought his playing was “pedestrian”. Ahhh, Jimmy…
Darby Mills growled and rocked for almost 2 hours, and she’ll be 60 in a couple of months! Susan and I were thrilled and amazed. Jimmy said nothing to me about her, thank goodness. For his sake…
Vanessa Collier is another artist I fell hard for. Woman writes, plays guitar, sings and blows a killer sax. And makes eye contact with everyone in the audience. EVERYONE.
Vanessa walking through the crowd during a 10 minute sax solo.
Jimmy to me: See, I told you they all do that.
Me to him: Jimmy, does the term “buzzkill” mean anything to you?!?
Of course I had to buy this T-shirt, referencing the lyrics to one of Vanessa’s songs – one inspired by her mother.

We saw one more act on that amazing, music-filled Saturday – Cedric Burnside, who played authentic, hypnotic “hill country” blues, according to Jimmy. He was great, but the music reminded me of how damn tired I was by this point, so I couldn’t stay for his whole set.

Cedric Burnside – wonderful, talented yet humble performer

Sunday morning brought the last act I had any stamina left for – A Beautiful Noise – the annual gospel breakfast by various artists.

The amazing Michelle White at Sunday’s Gospel Breakfast. She doesn’t want to be lost when Jesus comes – no thank you, ma’am!

After the gospel breakfast it was time to pack up, thank my wonderful hosts, and head back home (and collapse on the couch, truth be told). I barely had the strength to go onto iTunes and purchase the music from the artists I saw…sigh!

Here’s something that bothers me – people were saying that artists aren’t paid by iTunes and you should buy the CDs at the show if you want to support them. But I don’t want to buy a bunch of physical copies of the music (especially since I am moving AND my only CD player JUST died) – I’d prefer to have all my music in my iTunes library at this point. Is this true, that artists don’t make anything from iTunes? And how can that be? Why would anyone agree to have their music on iTunes if they weren’t being paid, or paid properly for it?

I bet Jimmy has an opinion on this. Too bad he left before I could ask him. 😉

Rock on,

The WB

Moving Thoughts #1: Rent or Own

On By Widow BadassIn Goals & Dreams, Move to Vancouver Island, Retirement53 Comments

Even though my impending move is still many months away, I am already consumed with THOUGHTS and FEELINGS about it. So I created a special place to put them in – this 18 month Moleskin journal:

I found a package of stickers at Michaels that seemed appropriate. And went appropriately to town on the cover.
The fact that the fountain pen ink is reddish and looks kinda like I am writing in blood may or may not hold appeal for me. Just sayin’.

So, as can be seen from this journal entry (made in early July), my plan is was to rent for a bit (up to a year) while I search for a new property to buy on the Island. I say “was”, because I had a bit of revelation this week.

I realized I was quietly stressing about the whole “renting for a bit” idea and decided to dig deeper on those feelings this week when I was at home recuperating from heat exhaustion – earned on my birthday, at WTFest.

(I still got to enjoy most of the festival but had to lie down in the shade during The Beaches’ set so I wouldn’t pass out, from overheating. 1 alcoholic drink and no food all afternoon/evening. What a rock n’ roller, eh? 😉 From badass to candyass in one afternoon – that’s me alright!)

I recovered enough to see these guys (Ubiquitous Synergy Seeker aka USS) put on a lengthy, satisfying set of all their great songs – they were the main attraction for me, at WTFest.

During a conversation with my daughter she brought up a concern that she may have to move around the island for work as she is at the start of her career, and didn’t want us to end up too far apart. I said: no worries, gonna rent at first anyways but that got me thinking. And with thinking came a bunch of fears and assumptions that needed deeper exploration.

I was raised by homeowners – people who believed 100% in the wisdom of investing in property vs. renting space. My goal as an adult was to rent the cheapest place possible until I had saved enough for a downpayment and could afford to take the plunge into home ownership myself. Why pay my landlord’s mortgage when I could be paying my own – was my rationale. Renting was a stop gap; something you did until you could do “better”.

I soon realized I was actually kinda scared of going back to renting again. It brought up all kinds of fears about: “wasting” money on rent; living in “suboptimal” conditions (when did I get so fucking bougie???); hating (already!) not being able to improve/decorate the living quarters I was paying for, to my satisfaction. And it brought back all my feelings about some of the yucky places I lived in over the years, with no money to fix them up. And how much I love the space I am living in currently, that I designed and decorated to my satisfaction (finally!!!)…A whole lot of feelings going on, yessirree.

Friends of mine recently went from homeowners to renters and spoke positively of freedom that comes from renting but I wasn’t convinced…I needed more information. Hard numbers, facts, figures!

As one does, I hit the interwebs looking for articles on renting in retirement. One especially spoke to (the MBA in) me – this enlightening article and embedded video, is worth a read/watch. Take your time. I’ll be here when you get back.

Long story short, I have a whole ‘nother attitude about renting. In fact, it is not out of the realm of possibility that I may never own a home again. Instead of tying up (and tying myself down with) funds in another property, I will invest what I clear from the sale of my current abode. What I earn from this could be applied to rent – against those pesky unrecoverable costs – leaving more of my capital intact, for a future home/hippy van/trip around the world/whatever else might strike my fancy purchase.

My friends were right. Renting can be freeing.

You know, I figured these anticipated life changes (retirement, moving) were going to spark some revelations for me. But I didn’t think it was going to happen quite this quickly. Or be quite so HUGE.

What about you? Thoughts on renting vs. owning, especially in retirement?

Rock on,

The WB