It Was But A Trifle, M’Dear #virtualteaparty2021

Firstly, apologies Dear Blogge for abandoning you lately. See, I’ve kinda been hibernating a bit – going inward as it were – and then there was all that horrible business of last week happening to our neighbour to the south, and well…my muse took a much longer holiday as a result.

So, Christmas happened and please allow me an indulgence here as I post about a baking misadventure from way back then. I really did plan to post about this in a more timely fashion. However, THAT never happened. So I humbly offer this as my entry into the first virtual tea party of 2021.

Allow me another indulgence to give you some backstory. The very first trifle I ever attempted was for a Christmas staff party at my work, back in about 1983. I know – ballsy, right? I was full of youthful energy and conceit confidence then and thought: how hard can it be, really? Cake, pudding, whipped cream, fruit, booze. Throw it together in a dish. Done. I had been intrigued by a recipe in Canadian Living magazine for something called Black Forest Trifle, and decided that was what I was going to bring.

Back in those childless, early-married days, I thought nothing of spending a whole day in the kitchen whipping up any recipe that caught my fancy so the fact that these instructions had you make EVERYTHING from scratch didn’t faze me in the least.

I brought the trifle to the potluck and added it to the other offerings. I don’t remember much of that particular meal except that at the conclusion, the big boss/owner of that particular lab asked “Ummm…who brought the trifle?”

I froze. This guy…Dr. Whatsisname…was English as all get out. What was I thinking, bringing my first attempt at England’s national dessert (it is, isn’t it?) to this goddamn lunch affair?!?! Dr. Whatsisname (sorry, I really have forgotten his name) continued in his plummy accent…”I consider myself to be something of a connoisseur when it comes to trifle. Who made this one?” I gulped and hesitantly put up my hand.

“Oh?” he continued, appearing mildly surprised that “the baby” of the lab – his youngest employee – had pulled off this culinary feat.

“I have to tell you that this is the best trifle that I have ever tasted.”

WELL. I hadn’t seen THAT coming in the armageddon of embarrassment scenarios that had been flashing before my mind’s eye since he asked about the trifle. This proved the recipe was clearly a keeper and I painstakingly wrote it in my smallest handwriting onto not one but two recipe cards (I told you everything had to be made from scratch) and hung onto it for thirty-seven long years. And naturally, I never made it again (sigh).

Until this Christmas.

First up, a few days before Christmas I made the almond macaroons to crumble onto the cake and jam layers.

Uh oh. This is not going well. At least they tasted good and they were going to be crumbled up anyways. Onwards…

Then I made the chocolate sponge cake.

No way to rescue this leathery pancake of a chocolate mess. Into the composting bin it went.
Hmmm. I don’t remember any of this happening the first (and only other) time I made this recipe.
I don’t usually eat candy canes, but one of my neighbours had stuck one in the mini-stocking I hung on my apartment door, and it seemed like the thing to do as I pondered my next move. Besides, it was too early for day-drinking, even for me.

It was Christmas Eve and there was no more time for fucking around experimentation. I ran to the grocery store and got the supplies I needed to pull this thing off.

After my first 2 fails, there was no way I was going to attempt the custard from scratch. Wise decision. Note offending recipe in the upper left corner.
The cake turned out wonderful – hallelujah! I spread it with cherry jam and had enough for 2 dishes. One got splashed with rum; the smaller one got only cherry juice. In case (gasp!) someone didn’t want to have the boozy dessert. Like my step-grandkids.
Next I added the “crumbled macaroons”. A-hem. Moving on.
Cherry layer added.
My custard turned out perfect. Thank you Bird’s Custard Powder, for having my back! I put the trifles onto the balcony to keep them cool until the next day, when the rest of the assembly would happen.
Next day…on Christmas afternoon: Bettie Page the Kitchen Aid (she so sex-ay!) whipped the cream for me. Good job, Betts!
Whipped cream, chocolate shavings and almonds added. Seashell Jesus arose from my basement storage unit to oversee the final touches and approve of the finished product. If ever a dessert needed divine intervention, this was it. His expression and body language seems to say: Really, girl? How could you have fucked up this recipe?
I swear I saw him raise an eyebrow at me.

Because of the pandemic, Christmas was going to be a bit of a drive-by visit rather than an actual one. In the late afternoon, I packed up the trifles and Christmas goodies and brought them over to my daughter’s place. They had my step-grandkids with them for the holidays (from the plague-land mainland, so the decision was made that it be best we stay apart unless we could meet outdoors, for the duration of their visit). I exchanged the trifles for containers full of 3 days’ worth of Christmas dinner deliciousness, and went back to my place. The trifles were very well received. Although no “best trifle ever” accolades were forthcoming. Those are still held by the fresh berry trifles I made last summer.

Does anything taste better than a Christmas dinner you didn’t have to cook yourself?
I think not.

And there went another Christmas into the history books…and one for the history books! All things Covid-19 considered, it wasn’t that awful and certainly not the first Christmas I have spent alone.

There was only one thing left to be done, though.

In case I EVER get inspired to follow this recipe again. I am at a loss as to why it didn’t work this time. From “best trifle ever” to unholy mess…Burn baby, burn!
Perhaps I left out some vital instructions when transcribing it all those many years ago???
I will never ever know…

Thank you for allowing all these indulgences…and for joining me in this month’s Virtual Tea Party – hosted by Del and Su

Rock on,

The WB

74 thoughts on “It Was But A Trifle, M’Dear #virtualteaparty2021

  1. I just want to laugh. Sorry. I don’t even know exactly what I find funny.

    It could be:
    1) spending all day in the kitchen to make a recipe. BWAHAHAHA!!! yeaaaah – no. You did the right thing. Burn that baby so you aren’t ever tempted again 😉

    2) Seashell Jesus judging your offering.

    3) Pineapple placemat. Christmas. Canada. 🤣🤣🤣

    4) the sprig of holly. Love.

    Your usual wonderful sense of humour shines through!

    1. Thank you, Joanne 💕 Nothing about this Christmas was like I had thought it would be (as it was for just about everybody else too) so I just had to laugh at myself, as usual.

  2. I just love you.
    I also feel like Seashell Jesus wasn’t judging but merely saying, “been there, sis”. Maybe he had a trifle snafu of his own?

    I am going to sound so American when I say that I hear the word trifle and think of Rachel from Friends making the dessert trifle with meat and peas. It ruined trifle for me for a very long time. 🙂

    1. Thank you, Kari 💕 I just learned about the Friends trifle episode! I was watching an English drag queen recreate it on YouTube, to prank her friends. I almost included the link in this post.

  3. A great title, Deb, You know how to make me smile. 😁 I have eaten other people’s trifles, yet never made one myself. I have read Canadian Living magazine for decades and usually the recipes turn out well. Flashback on the everything from scratch….the entire meal…..what were we thinking?!

    Deb, my take, on some of the recipes (stained paper copies) I have been using is how some of the ingredients are different now. Last year (2019) Christmas I made rolled cookies with my granddaughters and the dough was hard and not malleable. Exact same recipe/ingredients. I had to Macgyver the dough. Not a pretty site. See you soon.💕

    1. Thank you, Erica 💕 Very happy to learn that my misery has company! Hmmm, I never thought about the ingredients changing. Seems to me that has happened before to me when resurrecting an old “sure thing” recipe…maybe I am not to blame after all??? That would be a first. 😁

  4. Your Bettie Page the Kitchen Aid needs to meet my Bluesy the Mixing Floozy. They’d get along, I just know it.

    I’m glad you can laugh about your fall from Triffle greatness. I’ve never tried to make one, but admire you for giving it a go. I’m sure Seashell Jesus blesses your efforts, too.

    1. Do you think they are related? Could be long lost sisters. There have been so many falls from greatness for me, on my journey through life. Especially where I was never that great to begin with. 🤣 At least they keep me amused. Thank you, Ally 💕

  5. I have never trifled with a trifle. (Sorry, couldn’t resist) But I’m impressed you did, and I’m sure your family, especially grandkids, didn’t appreciate all that effort. But someday they will look back and say…”What WAS that desert grams made back in 2020?” And you can whip out this blog post and all of you can relive the Christmas trifle!

    1. Thank you, Dawn 💕 I think that particular trifle will ONLY be relived by reading ye olde blogge. As I mentioned in the post, I was told it didn’t hold a candle to one in particular that I created last summer. Therefore I held a candle…to the recipe cards! 😁

  6. Even though I knew some of this story, I laughed all the way through it. I didn’t realize that I (perhaps) wasn’t supposed to do that until I read Joanne’s comment! In my defense, it’s your warm, unflitchingly honest writing style, your creative phrases, and your hilarious crossouts of word choices. I’m sad that you burned the recipe card. You have to admit, tht trifle did inspire a great blog post. 😀

  7. I also laughed all the way through and think it’s the honesty and the strike outs! So funny. Loved the Mr whatshisname! I can hear the voice and it’s hilarious that you don’t actually remember his name.
    Just an actual thought on the baking etc – you are now at sea level. Presuming in Ontario you were not. It does affect baking times and rise. I don’t get it but it does, it’s on a long list of things that I don’t truly get.
    I have missed your posts and your witty friends comments. Hope we hear an updated apartment that the muse must be thinking about!

    1. Thank you, Bernie 💕 I’d love to use the sea level excuse, believe me! But I’ve baked quite a bit since moving here and nothing has failed at the catastrophic levels like my chocolate sponge cake did. It literally takes the cake 🙄. I keep meaning to do an update post on my new life here. 6 months came and went and I should have gotten that post out of my head and onto the blogge. Argh…maybe soon…

  8. It probably would have tasted wonderful Deb. I just think of all those calories and ripped cream. My weakness is for lemon curd in a tart with, of course, a dollop of whipped cream.
    Leslie xoxo

  9. debscarey

    Deb, if you hadn’t burned it, I’d have been asking for the recipe. Himself heard someone mention a black forest gateaux this week and he absolutely loved the idea.. He’s in the midst of a trifle making kick at the moment – and also does everything from scratch – so I know he’ll be looking for recipes. Nevertheless, I’m glad that you came down to earth with the rest of us mortals and did some stuff from packets 😉

    1. Thank you, Deb 💕 There are many recipes for Black Forest Trifle on ye olde Google, as I found out frantically on Christmas Eve. Including one from Canadian Living Magazine that bears scant resemblance to what I had scratched out on those recipe cards, oh so many years ago 🤷‍♀️

  10. Dear Deb, I humbly and sincerely thank you for writing this post, AND I defy anyone to say this isn’t THE BEST TRIFLE they’ve EVER had. And that you’ve gone to great lengths to bring it to fruition just for us is Most Generous! Thank You! Thank You! Thank You!
    As I’m in plague-land south, enduring last week’s headlines has been a trial — tto keep from screaming I TOLD YOU SOOO at the TV. But I did want to share a more light-hearted bit with you, my dear northern sistah: The headline reads, “Mexico now wants wall & they’ll pay!” Followed by Breaking News: “Canada wants one, too.”
    del xxx(hiccup)xx
    PS/Can I lick the bowl?

    1. Of course you may lick the bowl, and the beater, dear Del 💕 Thank you! Hehehe – yes, I’ve seen that bit too and did chuckle. Although I would never want a wall between us. I still believe the majority of Americans are lovely people.

  11. Pingback: Friday’s Virtual Tea Party | Curls n Skirls

  12. Hahahahaha! I must get me one of them seashell Jesuses! I just love my Jesuses to look like Southern California surfer boys.

    I like to cook and bake… somewhat… but I always first look at the length of the ingredient list and directions. If it approaches a novel in length, I turn the page. Your trifle looks so good, though, and definitely worth the effort (as long as it is your effort, not mine). Just make sure mine’s the one with the booze.

    1. Definitely, Janis ! My trifles invariably contain booze. The only reason I made 2 versions is because the chocolate cake I made from the mix threatened to overflow my biggest bowl, so I had to split it up. Yeah, that Jesus…not what I picture when I think of someone from that part of the world. Thanks 💕

  13. AJ Blythe

    I hate it when a recipe’s first shine of brilliance can never be repeated – happens to me more often than I care to admit, lol. But it sounds like you were able to rescue dessert and still have a lovely Christmas. We also had a quiet one (border closures meant it was just us). Our New Year has been easier to endure because while we get the news from orange-land, we are (literally) half a world away, so the impact is considerably lessened. We just watch on, thinking, “What the…?”

  14. The only thing better than a Christmas dinner you didn’t have to cook is a Christmas dinner you didn’t have to clean up after. Yay you. As fit seashell Jesus, I’m not sure I could stand the pressure of his withering stare. So judgey.
    😉

  15. hilarymb

    Hi Deb … like Rivergirl I’d be worried about Seashell Jesus keeping an eye on me … but the idea of a Blackforest Trifle sounds so delicious … just the way of life … things don’t quite work … as I found out in Johannesburg v sealevel. The Christmas dinner looks good though – especially when cooked by someone else. I’m loaded up with excess turkey (in the freezer with some gravy – helps keep it from drying out, I gather) as SIL had far too much … so must make turkey and leek pie or something similar. I’d be laughing too – and am laughing at thinking about it all … then your boss all those years ago – there must be a continuing storyline there?! Take care and welcome back to 2021 as life moves along … one hopes this year things will get along the path of improvement … cheers! – Hilary

    1. Turkey and leek pie sounds mouth-wateringly good to me! I have many stories and observations about my work life…of which most will show up on ye olde blogge eventually now that I am retired and can spill the tea with impunity😉. You’re the second person to mention the sea level thing. Thank you, Hilary and happy 2021 to you as well! 💕

  16. Mona R McGinnis

    E for effort and all that. Interesting comment about the change in ingredients. I’ve noticed that some things just aren’t the same in texture or taste and wondered if it’s the ingredient or a change in my palate. My grandpa was known to say – it all comes out the same in the end!

    1. Hehehe! Gotta love grandpas and their sayings…mine used to mix everything up on his plate, saying it’s going to be mixed anyways, where it’s going. Thanks, Mona 💕

  17. Haha, this made me laugh. I love the pictures too! And I’m a super fan of semi-homemade.

    I had a similar thing happen with a brownie recipe I make that ALWAYS turns out. Apparently, my new oven runs hot so I overbaked them. I had to cook them for a shorter amount of time (and watch them like a hawk).

    I’m so glad you had some fun and got a little bit time in with the family. Happy New Year!

  18. I applaud you for trying this. Again. Who has the patience? Who has the time? Oh, wait, WE ALL HAVE THE TIME. I’m just a horrible baker, so I would have went to the bakery and picked out something very pretty to bring.
    Happy 2021!

  19. I love reading about other people’s cooking challenges and so glad NOT to be alone. My new husband, who was raised on “Birds”, was very excited I’d found a little British store down the road. He asked me to see if they had Christmas pudding and “Birds.” I found both and to my relief did not have to come up with a desert. He’s also introduced me to “Bisto!” Haha! Welcome to 2021, I hope to blog again soon too.

    1. OMG, I was raised on Bisto and am not British ( well, at least I thought I wasn’t until I had my DNA analyzed…somewhere along the line some Brits snuck onto my family tree). I won’t be without Birds ever again. It (and Bisto) can be found in every grocery store here in “the colonies“😉. Thanks, Tracey 💕

  20. Ho ho! So funny and not a trifling disaster at all. Good on you for saving the day and providing a trifle delivery service, to boot. What I really like about this post, aside from your humour, is the idea of a virtual tea-party, kind of like the blogger gang who do the “Thursday Doors”. It could be a regular thing wherein you invite others to join the party and bring their favourite tea (Earl Grey for me, please) and share a recent triumph or disaster. Rock on, Deb!

    1. Thank you, Susanne 💕 The virtual tea party is the brainchild of Su, of Zimmerbitch…and has become a regular thing. It is co-hosted by another blogger named Del. I posted links to their sites above. They post the triumphs; I bring the disasters 🤣. You should join us!

      1. great to know this is a “thing” because it is a terrific idea. I’d love to join. Might fire up the blog-burner again but WPs new block editor takes so much friggin’ time (yes, yes, I know, I should learn it) that I’ve given up posting pictures. I’ve also given up sugar. can you have a tea party w/out sugar, I wonder? Or photos?

  21. Oh Deb, thank you for making my morning. Seashell Jesus watching over dessert would have been enough to make me smile, but the whole story is just brilliant. Trifle is a dessert I associate with my mother and it never looked as interesting as yours — nor tasted as good I imagine.

    Well done you!!

  22. For Christmas I asked my daughters to use their good hand-writing to make me a recipe book. My current method of recipes shoved in a tiny box is a disorganized mess, yet we do manage to eat . . . so it must be working. Anyway, now I fear they will miss some key ingredients in the transcribing into the new book. Who am I kidding? I like their handwriting, but I know the only way this is getting done is if I finish it up.

    I overdid it on the desserts this year. Nothing like a little comfort food when everything is cancelled.

    Sorry your trifle didn’t get another vote for best ever. Some recipes aren’t worth the headache.

    1. Thank you, Ernie 💕 This one definitely was not worth the headache, the 2nd (and last) time ‘round. What a great idea you have. Do you test drive the transcribed recipes? That’s what I should have done. I think I know what went wrong. I think I tried to halve the recipe when I wrote it down so it wouldn’t make such a big dessert…but who knows for sure…it was 37 years ago!!!!

  23. Hi Deb! Thank you for explaining VERY CLEARLY why I have never made nor never will make a truffle. Actually, because I can’t eat sweets or flour I don’t bake at all anymore so I don’t have to worry about these sorts of failures. But hey, it seemed to have turned out alright in the end and you get brownie points for trying. Now that xmas is behind us and hopefully this week we have good news for you from your neighbors to the south, I look forward to hearing what you next experiment is! ~Kathy

  24. I’d still eat it! 🙂 You are awesome for trying – and succeeding – in this culinary feat. I’ve never had a trifle in my life, but I enjoyed reading your (hilarious) step-by-step prep adventure. You are awesome as well as badass!

    1. Thank you, Liesbet 💕 If you ever get a chance to try trifle, do. I think it’s quite delicious, and the way I make it, it is not overly sweet so all the flavours get a chance to shine.

  25. Pingback: Virtual Afternoon Tea, January 2021 | Zimmerbitch

  26. I have missed your sense of humour, Deb! I am rolling in laughter and clutching my sides in empathy – it’s really Sod’s Law this pass around!

    Still, you got out a celebratory dessert and everyone enjoyed it. So there.

      1. I have been thinking about this Black Forest Trifle of yours – it actually sounds so delicious (I love black forest cake!). And the idea is such a good one, but it involves so many parts to actually bake!

  27. I just found you! You must be my long-lost, foul-mouthed sister of the heart. I’ve had so many similar baking disasters that, if you didn’t live somewhere very far away, I’d buy you a drink. Instead, I will toast you with my cup of tea gamely raised for a lady who tells it like it is–with an occasional colorful language thrown in for veracity’s sake.

    1. Well, thank you Long-Lost Sister 💕 There is nothing quite like a well-placed 4-letter word to punch up a post or get a point across, doncha think? At least, that’s how I feel. Fuck, that felt good to write. 🤣

  28. Pingback: Hell’s Home Kitchen – Napalm Edition | TheDustSeason

  29. Looking at that photo of the final delectable result, all I could think of was, “Oh no! Don’t burn the recipe cards.” I remember my aunt used to make trifle to use up leftover cake. What is “leftover cake?” I ask myself. Definitely not an ingredient I have hanging around here.

    Jude

  30. Pingback: What’s On My Bookshelf – Blast From the Past Edition – THE WIDOW BADASS BLOG

  31. Pingback: Silent (Mostly, and Silly, Continually) Saturday – Christmas 2021 – THE WIDOW BADASS BLOG

Here's where the magic happens. I love comments!

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.